'I Counted Calories in Toothpaste': Hilaria Baldwin Reveals Terrifying Details of 20-Year Battle with Anorexia

Hilaria Baldwin has laid bare the extreme depths of her eating disorder, confessing that at her lowest point, she was so consumed by anxiety she even counted the calories in her toothpaste.

The 42-year-old yoga instructor and reality TV star opened up about her two-decade struggle during a candid sit-down on Page Six Radio. "I did it all—anorexia, bulimia, bingeing, starving," Baldwin shared. "It got so bad at one point that I remember being terrified: how many calories are actually in my toothpaste?"

Diets at Age Five & Total Loss of Control

The wife of actor Alec Baldwin and mother of seven revealed that her toxic relationship with food began astonishingly early, admitting she was put on her first diet when she was just five years old. Over the years, her body cues completely broke down, leaving her unable to recognize basic hunger or fullness. "I look back at old photos now and realize I looked great," she reflected. "But back then, I felt like a whale. I felt like something inside me was completely broken."

The former Dancing with the Stars contestant emphasized that she had to undertake massive psychological work on herself before welcoming children. Surprisingly, she credits her ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) with helping her recover, as she redirected her intense hyperfocus toward holistic healing.

Escaping "Hell" for Her Seven Kids

Living with a severe eating disorder isolated Hilaria from normal social life for years:

• Social Isolation: "I couldn't have normal relationships, friendships, or even go out to dinner at a restaurant with someone. It was pure stress."

• Breaking the Cycle: Determined not to pass her body image issues down to her seven children, she now maintains open, positive conversations at home about strength, health, and fuel.

• No Food Guilt: While she isn't thrilled when her kids reach for Cheetos, she never shames them for what they eat.

In fact, Hilaria revealed that food no longer terrifies her: she recently enjoyed late-night Häagen-Dazs ice cream with her youngest daughter—a simple pleasure that would have sent her into a panic attack years ago.