“I Even Thoroughly Washed My Butt”: Manhattan Man Fired 2.5 Hours Into New Job Over “Hygiene Issues”

Thirty-five-year-old Manhattan resident Chris Smalls revealed in a viral Reddit post that he was fired just two and a half hours after starting a new job. His bosses reportedly cited “hygiene issues” as the reason, according to the NYP.

After nine months of unemployment, Smalls found the job through a staffing agency. He says he showered the night before and put on a brand-new polo shirt the next morning that he had specifically set aside for his first day at work.

His new position was at an artificial intelligence technology company, where he was supposed to work in the people operations department.

The first few hours went smoothly. Smalls worked through his onboarding tasks and familiarized himself with the new role. He was then told he could leave for lunch early.

But he never made it out of the building. Before he even left the office, Smalls received a call from the staffing agency. He was told that the company had decided to end his employment because of “hygiene issues.”

In a phone interview with The Post, Smalls said the agency employee who informed him of his dismissal herself seemed confused by the situation and did not explain exactly what had happened. The only thing she asked was what he had been wearing.

Smalls confirmed that he was wearing the same new polo shirt he had laid out the night before.

The fired employee insists that he looked presentable and was clean. Responding to doubts from Reddit users, he wrote: “I thoroughly washed myself, including my butt.”

Smalls did admit, however, that his pants “could have used a lint roller.”

So what could have prompted the complaint?

“Maybe it happened when I scratched my nose and it looked like I was picking it?” he speculated. “Maybe at some point I burped with my mouth closed and someone heard it? I really don’t know, and I still haven’t received any explanation.”

Some Reddit users sympathized with the man, while others questioned whether he really had no unpleasant odor.

Smalls decided to check for himself. He asked his roommate and a friend whether they noticed any bad smell coming from him. Both said no, and Smalls sees no reason to believe they were lying.

He also explained that he has a cat and a dog, but said he keeps his apartment clean.

Smalls told The Post that the staffing agency initially seemed interested in continuing to work with him. However, after another call during which he tried to explain his side of the story, he never heard back.

He also has yet to be paid for the few hours he worked.

The reaction online was mixed, ranging from sympathy to outright suspicion.

“You can shower badly and not thoroughly enough,” one user wrote, suggesting that Smalls should have showered in the morning, as “most adults” do. The commenter also said that after a night’s sleep, they consider using deodorant an essential daily ritual.

Another commenter, however, wrote: “I’m so sorry. After that I’d become insanely suspicious and start feeling terribly self-conscious. I’m sure they just needed a reason to get rid of you, and they chose the cruelest option.”

Some Reddit users suggested that Smalls may have fallen victim to a practice known as “hire to fire,” in which employees are hired with the expectation that they will soon be dismissed, for example, to meet internal staff turnover targets.

Smalls himself considers that possibility unlikely because his contract was short-term from the outset. After several weeks of thinking about what happened, he came up with his own theory.

“My best guess is they decided I was picking my nose,” he wrote.

Smalls is now looking for work again and admits he is not sure what conclusion can be drawn from the experience, other than one grim observation:

“Employers will make up any reason to fire you, and staffing agencies use people.”

“The laws governing employment termination need to change,” he added. “If New York didn’t have at-will employment, I probably would still be working there.”