British Scientists Discover Why Men Who Are Too Generous May Put Women Off

British scientists have once again tackled one of life’s most pressing questions: what exactly gets in the way of building a successful relationship? This time, they turned their attention to men who are especially generous with charitable donations.

Apparently, having a big heart is wonderful — but perhaps not too big. A new study has found that when a man is moderately generous, women may see him as an appealing candidate for a serious relationship. But once he starts giving away too much, his attractiveness suddenly drops.

Researchers surveyed around 1,000 women from the UK, the US and other countries. They were asked to evaluate a fictional man named Adrian. The hypothetical candidate earned £95,000 a year, was attractive, socially successful and, by all appearances, possessed many of the qualities associated with a successful date.

There was just one question left: how much money was he willing to give to people in need?

The women were shown different scenarios, ranging from no charitable donations at all to donations of £75, and were asked to rate Adrian as a potential partner for both a short-term romance and a serious long-term relationship.

And that was where British science uncovered a genuine romantic drama.

For short-term relationships, the more generous the man was, the more attractive he became. Apparently, the prospect of dating someone who is happy to part with his money can be particularly appealing.

Long-term relationships, however, proved more complicated. Adrian’s attractiveness increased along with the size of his donation — but only up to a certain point. Once the donation reached £75, interest in him dropped noticeably.

According to the researchers, moderate generosity may signal that a man is caring, cooperative, emotionally stable and capable of investing in a relationship.

But extremely costly altruism can create a very different impression: a man may appear impractical, unable to manage his resources or even someone who is trying a little too hard to demonstrate his moral virtue to others.

In other words, helping those in need is wonderful. Helping them so generously that your potential partner starts worrying about your financial planning is perhaps a little less romantic.

The researchers suggest that highly generous men may be particularly attractive for short-term relationships because such behavior could be perceived as a sign of boldness, willingness to take risks or abundant resources.

Professor Kirill Gruter, one of the study’s authors, nevertheless advises against turning the findings into a dating manual. According to him, moderate altruism proved particularly attractive to women who were considering the man as a long-term partner.

At the same time, he stressed that generosity may serve as a signal of caring, cooperation and willingness to invest in others — but without turning it into an “impractical extreme.”

There is, however, one small catch: the study has so far only been published as a preprint and has not undergone peer review. So British scientists have yet to provide an official answer to humanity’s most important question: exactly how much can a man donate to charity while saving the world without scaring away his future wife?