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Britney Spears has opened up once again about the difficult years she spent under a conservatorship that lasted nearly 14 years, and the lasting impact she says the experience had on her heart and soul. In a new video posted to Instagram, the 44-year-old singer appeared in a black bra and revealing lingerie as she recalled how, despite being extremely shy, she was forced to constantly find herself in front of huge crowds of people.

In the caption accompanying the post, Spears revealed that she experienced intense anxiety early in her career, even when meeting relatively small groups of fans. She said that whenever she had to interact with more than 10 people, she would suffer an asthma attack and begin shaking.

“I can’t believe I used to be able to perform in front of that many people. Oh my God,” the singer wrote.

Spears said she is particularly proud of herself now for walking away from her former lifestyle, claiming that for years she was simply forced into doing many things against her wishes.

According to the singer, her father, Jamie Spears, would make her meet with around 70 people at a time. For someone who struggled intensely with being the center of attention, it was an enormous challenge.

“I lost the sensitivity in my soul. It really hurt. I felt like a robot,” Britney admitted.

She also recalled that she once viewed her relationships with other people very differently. She said she was incredibly sensitive and “painfully shy,” and that connecting with others held a special, almost sacred value for her.

“I miss those real relationships with people that I used to have. Honestly, I felt like a robot, a machine. And thank God it’s over,” the star wrote.

Spears later reposted the video and added an even more emotional message.

“I feel like people still don’t understand the real damage that was done to my heart and soul during the conservatorship,” the singer said.

In her post, Spears also reflected on how dramatically she changed throughout her career. She admitted that as a young woman, she was able to transform into a completely different person onstage despite her naturally shy personality.

“It’s strange. I was painfully shy, but onstage I was able to become someone else,” she wrote.

According to the singer, that chapter of her life gradually came to an end after she had children. She said that, over time, her former stage persona began to feel excessive, while some of the things she once did now seemed ridiculous and even embarrassing.

Spears also unexpectedly compared herself to Shakira. She recalled meeting the Colombian singer in Los Angeles and said that, for the first time, she felt completely ordinary.

“She was exactly my height. We really were like twins. It was crazy. Finally, I felt normal,” Spears recalled.

Britney Spears was placed under a court-ordered conservatorship in February 2008 following a series of highly publicized personal crises, hospitalizations and unprecedented media scrutiny. For years, her father, Jamie, effectively controlled significant aspects of her finances, career and personal life.

The conservatorship ended in November 2021, after nearly 14 years.

Jamie Spears maintained that his control had been necessary to protect his daughter and her well-being. Britney herself has repeatedly described what happened to her as abusive and deeply harmful.

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