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A famous YouTuber and animator has revealed he is seriously considering medically assisted suicide in Switzerland, confessing that chronic pain has left him unable to create content and drowned him in medical debt.

38-year-old Max Gilardi, known online as hotdiggedydemon, dropped the bombshell during a Saturday livestream.

“Having considered every option conceivable to me, the ultimate conclusion that I came to was doctor-assisted euthanasia,” Gilardi shared with his viewers.

Gilardi gained massive internet fame for his viral animated parodies of popular franchises. His channel boasts over 2.1 million subscribers and nearly half a billion total views.

‘I Am Tired of Living in Constant Pain’

However, health struggles that began in 2024 with a diagnosis of fibromyalgia—a condition causing widespread body pain—drastically derailed his productivity.

“I’m tired. I feel exhausted all the time, and I’m pretty much laying down most of the day. I’m in crazy pain in all of my joints and muscles: ankles, shins, hands, knees, hips, neck. It’s very difficult to sleep,” Gilardi said.

The animator also listed a slew of unexplained symptoms that doctors have yet to diagnose, including sudden excessive salivation and speech difficulties.

Compounding his health crisis is the mounting financial toll of healthcare.

“Nothing costs more than just staying alive,” the YouTuber emphasized. “My life has turned into a vicious cycle: suffering and barely making ends meet just to maintain an existence where I’m suffering and barely making ends meet all over again.”

He added that his decision to end his life came after deep reflection and feels like a “natural conclusion.”

Legal Confusion and Fan Reaction

Gilardi noted that he plans to travel to Switzerland, mistakenly stating that euthanasia is legal there.

Under Swiss law, active euthanasia (where a medical professional directly administers a lethal dose) is actually prohibited. However, the country does allow assisted suicide, where the individual must physically perform the final act themselves.

The creator’s harrowing broadcast triggered shockwaves and a wave of concern across the internet. In response to the overwhelming outcry, Gilardi posted an update on X (formerly Twitter) on Sunday indicating he is stepping back from the brink for now.

“Decided I wasn’t thinking very clearly right now. I’m going to reconsider,” the animator wrote.

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